If I were a stone, I would be: Jade � dark, with little bits of other stuff floating around in there�

If I were a tree, I would be: Realistically, an Oak�but I�d rather be an Aspen.

If I were a bird, I would be: an Eagle.

If I were a flower/plant, I would be: an Iris.

If I were a kind of weather, I would be: Stormy. Yeah, quit nodding in agreement.

If I were a mythical creature, I would be: A fawn. Because it�s really the only one I can think of right now, aside from a unicorn and I am just NOT a unicorn, sadly.

If I were a musical instrument, I would be: a Viola. Because it�s big, has strings and can be lovely or loud and screechy.

If I were an animal, I would be: a Bear. Because�don�t ya just think that fits?

If I were a color, I would be: Jade green. See above.

If I were an emotion, I would be: Passion. And I don�t just mean what you think I mean. Get your mind out of the gutter, people.

If I were a vegetable, I would be: Corn. I am the food of my people.

f I were a fruit, I would be: Rupert Everett. Hee.

If I were a sound, I would be: A faucet, dripping water. You know � highly annoying and some of my parts need to be fixed.

If I were an Element, I would be: Air�like that stuff in my head.

If I were a song, I would be: �I�ve Always Been Crazy� by Waylon Jennings (�but it�s kept me from going insane.�)

If I were to trade places with another person, it would be: Jennifer Anniston�because she gets to sleep with Brad Pitt. Didn't we cover this recently?

If I were a movie, I would be: Sid and Nancy�no, I�m kidding. I�d really probably be Bridget Jones� Diary, only without the happy ending and making out with Colin Firth (thus far).

If I were a novel, I would be: A Joyce Carol Oates book of short stories.

If I were a play, I would be: Long Days Journey into Night cuz it always seems to take an awful long time for the day to end.

If I were a food, I would be: Carne Adovada

If I were a place, I would be: Santa Fe, NM

If I were a material, I would be: Hemp

If I were a taste, I would be: Sweet, of course.

If I were a religion, I would be: The Church of England. Because, like Henry VIII, I�d probably just start my own, too.

If I were a word, I would be: the �F� word � funky.

If I were an object, I would be: a hammer�really only because this whole survey has been making me sing �If I Had a Hammer�

If I were a body part I would be: a heart.

If I were a facial expression I would be: puzzlement.

If I were a subject in school I would be: US History.

If I were a cartoon character I would be: truthfully, probably Wyle E Coyote, but I long to someday become Rocko.

If I were a shape I would be: I am a shape. It�s somewhere between a pear and an apple�

If I were a number I would be: OK, those of you who said I�d be 666 should be ashamed of yourself! I�d really be 3�or 10.

If I were a month I would be: October. Cuz I like to change like the leaves.

If I were a day of the week I would be: Saturday, baby. All day to do whatever you want to do.

If I were a time of day I would be: 7:00pm � just as the action gets started.

f I were a direction I would be: South by Southwest�although actually, I�d probably be directionLESS.

If I were a sin I would be: Covet

If I were a virtue I would be: Virtue? Huh? I do not understand these high-falutin� words�

If I were a historical figure I would be: Napoleon. Because I�m a short person with issues, too.

If I were a liquid I would be: Vodka. I�m transparent, I�m smooth and I�m rather tasty.

If I were a method of death I would be: What? Who made up these questions? Um�I�d say I�m most like a gun shot.

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~~~~~~~~~~~peace, love and smooches~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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Copyright 2002-2005, Howl-at-the-Moon Words



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